A Letter to Cancer

Dear Cancer,

For years, you have been subtly making your way into our world, plotting your takeover, dreaming your victory. You managed to mysteriously enter and disguise yourself as a part of us, even convincing our own bodies to turn against itself. You pride yourself on your sneaky and subtle ways. However, today, let me be the first to inform you that you have been exposed. Fear has been your fuel and you have used it to weaken your victims and their families in an attempt to convince us that you are stronger.

No more.

Today, I make a declaration, a statement over myself, my family, my community, and all those who refuse to let you gain ground. We are not scared of you. Your existence does not give you power and you have no authority to affect my emotional and spiritual well being.

I will not whisper your name as if it is to be revered nor attempt to cover you in shame. You are simply not worthy. Yes, you have waged war on my body yet my victory is inevitable.

You see, I know that you know that I know who I am and who my Father is. And I know that you know that I know that while the struggle is real, the end has already been determined…and that you lose. Any gains you might make are temporary and in no way indicative of your strength or victor. Your attempts are futile and I deem you pathetic.

I refuse to give you access to my relationships, especially my marriage. I refuse to allow you to sew seeds of fear and guilt and resentment and attempt to reap discord. I refuse to let you steal my romance in fear that it might be my last and I refuse to avoid vulnerable conversation in fear of what subject might be broached. I will hold tight to what I know is true and not allow you to run away with my emotions. Period.

Every morning I wake up with joy, I win, and every night I fall asleep in peace, I win. With each kiss I share with my husband, I win, and with every milestone I celebrate with my daughter, I win. Each hour I spend pursuing my dreams in spite of what statistics say, I win, and every decision I make without a trace of fear, I win.

And every time I win…you lose.

As joyful mornings evolve into peaceful sleeps, a day has passed. And without you knowing, that day becomes weeks, weeks becomes months, and months become years, Years of choosing to be stronger than you, knowing who I am is greater than anything and everything you will ever be.

Your name might be cancer but my name is victorious…and I will win.

Sincerely,

Mallory Cruz